Herc’s Seen WONDERFALLS’ First New THURSDAY Episode!! I am - Hercules!!

Wonderfalls 1.4 FAQ What’s it called? “Pink Flamingos.”

Who’s responsible? Teleplay is credited to Gretchen Berg & Aaron Harberts, they of “Roswell” and “John Doe” fame.

What does TV Guide say? “After ignoring a voice results in an injury to her father, Jaye reluctantly obeys the next one, which asks her to assist at her high-school reunion with a perky nemesis against whom Mahandra holds a grudge. Gretchen: Chelan Simmons. Beth: Kari Matchett. Robert: Noah Klar. Chuck: Michael Buie. Tow Truck Driver: Sarah Armenia.”

Is the move to Thursdays permanent? Very, very highly placed sources suggest much will be decided after the ratings for tonight’s installment are glimpsed. Let’s hope the move is permanent; the only previous Thursday airing (a repeat of the pilot) garnered the show its best ratings to date.

So how does this installment fit into the show continuity-wise? This was actually the very first regular episode shot, once Fox saw the pilot and decided to order a series. It was originally intended to air right after the pilot, but the powers that be decided to create “Karma Chameleon” and “Wound-Up Penguin” much later in the production schedule to clear up a few issues that haunted pilot-viewing test audiences. (You’ll note that the chameleon and the penguin will not be lurking about in the next handful of ‘sodes)

What do the flamingos say? “Get off your ass.”

What else is TV Guide not telling us? Later on, a cartoon chicken cackles evilly, “Destroy Gretchen! Destroy herrrr!!”

The big news? Jaye is ultimately compelled to obey. She destroys Gretchen.

What’s great? Besides the demonic cartoon chicken? The desperation with which Jaye fast-forwards the photo album. The next 50 years in the life of Gretchen’s husband. The episode’s renewed emphasis on the lesbianic: sister Sharon Tyler invites her hot new girlfriend over and they have hot sex on the floor of her parents’ living room!

How does it end, spoiler boy? “Say,” asks daddy Darrin Tyler, “did you know our basic cable comes with lesbian porn?”

Herc’s rating for “Wonderfalls” 1.4? ***1/2 The Hercules T. Strong Rating System: ***** better than we deserve **** better than most motion pictures *** actually worth your valuable time ** as horrible as most stuff on TV * makes you quietly pray for bulletins 9 p.m. Thursday. Fox. Swing the crebbil! I am - Hercules!!

Watch “Wonderfalls”!! Herc says it’s the season’s best new show!! 9 p.m. Thursday!! Fox!!