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Angel 5x08 Destiny - Transcript

Thursday 27 November 2003, by Webmaster

ANGEL TRANSCRIPT "Destiny" 5x08- Episode #96

written by David Fury & Steven S. DeKnight directed by Skip Schoolnik originally aired November 19, 2003

NB: The content of this transcript, including the characters and the story, belongs to Mutant Enemy. This transcript was created based on the broadcast episode.

Transcribed by: CariCranberry Originally transcribed for: http://www.buffyworld.com/.


1 INT. VICTORIAN ERA HOTEL - DAY TITLE: Royal London Hotel, England, 1880 A man and woman can be heard giggling on the other side of the lobby doors. William pushes the double-doors open and pushes Drusilla through, closing the doors behind them. William has his arms wrapped around her waist from behind, then turns her to face him, pushing her against the wall and nibbling at her neck. NOTE: "William" is Spike’s given name. The scene takes place before he adopted the nickname "Spike."

DRUSILLA Oh. Such a hungry little kitty. (gently pushes him back) Meow. (walks out to the open area of the lobby) You’ve been a starved one, haven’t you, my sweet Willy?

WILLIAM I’ve got you to feast on now, pet. Is this your home?

DRUSILLA Their home. (looks at a pair middle-aged corpses slumped on the sofa, posed as if they were sitting) Ambassador to...something and his plump, lovely wife. Till their spirits flew away on fairy wings. (whispers) Psst. When Angelus took them for dinner.

WILLIAM (gawking at the corpses) Angelus? Who the bloody hell’s Ang-? (turns to see Angelus lurking in the shadows in a nearby doorway)

DRUSILLA Look what I made. It’s called Willy.

WILLIAM William.

DRUSILLA (smiles) Where’s Darla? I want Darla to see William.

ANGELUS (walks closer to them) Darla and I had a little spat. Her precious master sent for her. You know Darla. Master’s pet.

DRUSILLA Oh. Poor Angelus.

ANGELUS Ah, don’t fret, Dru. We’ll make up. Always do. (touches his bruised brow) Mmm. Ow. After a little tit for tat. Shouldn’t let that spoil our fun here. (looks at William, checking him out) So, instead of just feeding off of this William... you went and turned him into one of us. Another rooster in the henhouse.

DRUSILLA You’re not cross with me, are you?

ANGELUS Cross? (grabs William’s arm and holds it out into the ray of sunlight beaming through the closed curtains) Do you have any idea what it’s like having nothing but women as travel companions, night in and night out?

WILLIAM (angrily yanks his sizzling hand away from Angelus) Touch me again-

ANGELUS Don’t mistake me. I do love the ladies. It’s just lately... I’ve been wondering... (holds his own fist in the beam of sunlight) what it’d be like... (watches his hand sizzle) to share the slaughter of innocents... with another man. (turns his hand over so the palm is in the light now; looks admiringly at it as it smokes) Don’t... don’t think that makes me some kind of a deviant, hmm? (pulls his hand back close to his face) Do you?

Staring at Angelus, William sticks his own hand in the light-voluntarily this time)

ANGELUS (laughs, slaps William on the shoulder affectionately) Au ah! I like this one! You and me, we’re gonna be the best of friends.

Angelus and William laugh together.

Cut to:

2 INT. LOBBY - DAY Angel walks down the steps into the lobby, walking briskly toward Harmony’s desk, followed by Spike.

ANGEL Get the hell away from me, Spike.

SPIKE Would that I could, you big ape. (walks through a column while following Angel) ’Til then, why don’t you make us both happy and give me what I want?

ANGEL You’re not getting an office. (Harmony hands him his mail)

SPIKE You selfish sod. The rest of your lot get to go home to their nice and cozies. Me? I gotta nest in somebody else’s roost. It’s not bleeding right.

ANGEL You don’t work here. You haunt this place-and annoy me. That’s all. (walks to his office)

SPIKE Job well done, eh? At least give me Wesley’s office. I mean, since he’s gone.

ANGEL He’s not gone. He’s on a leave of absence. (walks into his office, shuts the door behind him)

SPIKE Yeah, right. Boo-hoo. Thought he killed his bloody father. (yelling after Angel) Try staking your mother when she’s coming on to you!

HARMONY Well... that explains a lot. (Spike starts to respond, but then decides to walk off) Spike.

SPIKE (irritated) Look, that was a long time ago. She wasn’t herself.

HARMONY (holds up a package) You got mail.


HARMONY It’s addressed to you, care of here.

SPIKE Who the hell’d be sending post to a...

HARMONY Ghost? (shakes head) Doesn’t say. Kind of heavy. Here. (Spike holds up his hands) Oh. You want me to-

SPIKE If you don’t mind.

Harmony uses the letter opener to slice through the packing tape and opens the package. Upon opening, the package releases a flash of bright white light. Harmony blinks dramatically, then looks at Spike.

SPIKE Well, that was a slap and a tickle.

HARMONY (peers inside) There’s nothing- (telephone rings, Harmony answers) Morning, Wolfram and-aah! (the phone makes an electronic screeching noise)

SPIKE (walks toward Angel’s office) Any more fireworks for me, I’ll be in here telling your boss what a miserable bastard- (walks into Angel’s door, bounces off of it, landing on the floor) Bugger! That hurt. (the telephones are ringing off the hook) (Angel walks out of his office and stares at Spike on the floor in front of his door) Hold on...

Fade to black.

Opening credits.


3 INT. LOBBY - DAY Resume. Spike has just run into Angel’s door and fallen to the ground. In the background, there’s the constant noise of all the telephones ringing.

SPIKE (stands) Hey. I’m- (touches his chest) I can feel. (touches Angel’s chest)

ANGEL Hey. Stop touching me. (pushes Spike’s hand away)

SPIKE (licks his lip to discover his nose had bled a bit from his run-in with the door) Mmm! I can- (grabs a mug from Angel’s hand)


SPIKE (drinks deeply from Angel’s mug) Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Oh, God. It’s bloody ambrosia. (looks at the cup, smiling, then looks at Angel) Is this otter?

GUNN Hey, what’s going-

SPIKE (hugs Gunn enthusiastically around the neck) I’m back, Charlie boy! That’s what’s going!

GUNN He’s corporeal. When did this- I mean, how?

ANGEL I don’t know. He just-

SPIKE I got it. It must’ve been that box of flash I got in the mail.

ANGEL You got-from who?

SPIKE Don’t know, don’t care. But if you see him, give him a bloody kiss on the mouth for me.

ANGEL Harmony, what is going on with the phones?

HARMONY (walks out from behind the desk toward the others) Nobody knows. It’s, like, all over the office. (Spike smiles as he checks her out) And all there is is, "eee!" on the other end. Plus, now my computer’s freaking.

SPIKE Harm. (grabs Harmony passionately and kisses her)

HARMONY Get off. (pushes Spike away, disgusted) Ew.

SPIKE That’s the idea. (to Angel) I need to borrow your Gal Friday for a bit.

ANGEL Permission denied.

SPIKE I wasn’t asking. (grabs Harmony by the wrist and starts walking away)

HARMONY My God! (wrenches her wrist away from him) Oh, my God. What? You think just ’cause you’re all... solid now, that I’m gonna go-

SPIKE (looks at her in earnest)
 that’s a very pretty skirt you’re wearing.

Harmony tries to maintain her anger with Spike, but he keeps giving her that sexy look and she melts, no longer able to suppress a smile at the thought.

HARMONY (turns to Angel, smiling broadly) Taking a long lunch, boss.

Spike takes Harmony by the hand, leading her down the hallway.

Cut to:

4 INT. VICTORIAN ERA COACH - NIGHT Angelus and William are laughing as they ride through the night in a horse-drawn carriage.

WILLIAM And then, when you leapt up right in the middle of the ceremony, grabbed the priest’s head, and squeezed it until it popped like...

ANGELUS Rotted melon.

Angelus pulls the woman sitting beside him closer-it’s a bride, bleeding from fang marks on her neck, barely alive, but still frightened.

WILLIAM Yes! Eyeballs dangling from the sockets, and you shouting, "Frankly, father, thine eyes offend me." (laughs, sits back) Bloody priceless. And beating the groom to death with his own arm, I mean, honestly, you’re a bloody killing marvel.

ANGELUS Yeah. Have a drink.

WILLIAM No, that’s your spoils, mate.

ANGELUS I’ve had my fill. Go on, take her.

WILLIAM Nah. I think I might go and find Drusilla. She’s prowling for street urchins in the east end. Make her happy if I joined her for a bit.

ANGELUS She’s special, isn’t she? Our Drusilla.

WILLIAM More than that. She brought me into this world. Where I was meant to be. It’s like... she’s my destiny.

ANGELUS Yeah, she is a sweet plum. I mean, a bit dotty and brain-addled, but-

WILLIAM She’s not- She’s just- It’s like she’s still got a bit of a child in her.

ANGELUS Perhaps 2 or 3 by now. (knocks on the carriage wall behind him) Driver! Stop the coach! (sighs) Happy hunting. Go on. Just be home before sunrise.

William climbs out of the carriage.

Cut to:

5 INT. HALLWAY - DAY Spike leads Harmony down the hallway, holding her hand. She giggles with excitement as Spike searches each room they pass. After passing one office, Spike stops and turns back to it.

SPIKE You. We need your office. Get out. (walks into the office)

MAN What?! I don’t take orders from a gh- (Spike grabs the man’s arm and pulls him toward the door) Hey!

SPIKE Come on, then.

MAN You can’t- (wrestles himself free of Spike’s grip) Get your hands off-

Spike shoves the man outside the office and closes the door. The man knocks on the door angrily.

SPIKE Piss off!

MAN (stares at the door, then walks down the hallway, stopping to talk to a man at the copier station) You’re not gonna believe this, Jerry. I just got thrown out of my own office. That ghost pal of Mr. Goodfang, I guess he’s-

Jerry, who was using the copier, turns to the man, his eyes red and dripping blood.

JERRY (in a low, growly voice) Toner.

MAN Jerry?!

JERRY (beating the man mercilessly with a fire extinguisher) Nobody...replaces... the toner!

Cut to:

6 INT. LOBBY - DAY Angel walks into the lobby talking to one of his office personnel.

ANGEL Kill ’em. All of ’em. The phones, the computers, shut ’em down. Find out if we got some kind of bug in the system and who put it there.

GUNN (walks up to Angel as the other man leaves) Figure we’re under some kind of attack again?

ANGEL I don’t know what to figure yet.

FRED (runs down the stairs to catch up to Angel and Gunn) Angel?

ANGEL Oh, let me guess. The lab computers are on the fritz.

FRED Well, yeah, but that’s just the tip of the fritzberg. The needles on our atmospheric gauges suddenly started spiking into red. Totally blew out the instruments.

ANGEL Sounds like some kind of electrical surge, like what’s affecting our phones and-

7 INT. ANGEL’S OFFICE - DAY Angel, Fred, and Gunn walk into Angel’s office, continuing their conversation.

FRED Well, yeah. That’s what I thought at first, but I think it might be something else.

ANGEL Never simple, is it? (picks up his mug) He drank all my blood. (turns, yells) Harmony!

GUNN She’s off having a nooner with Blondie Bear, remember?

Angel sighs, exasperated.

FRED She’s what?

GUNN You know, "nooner." When you have sex in the middle of-

FRED I know what a nooner is, Charles. You said she’s with Spike?

ANGEL Uh, yeah. He’s corporeal again. (sits in his desk chair)

FRED Corporeal?

GUNN Yeah. He got something in the mail. Flash, bam, boom... he’s a solid citizen again.

FRED Oh, my God why didn’t you call me?

ANGEL I’m sorry. We just, you know, we’ve had our hands full dealing with the glitch in the office system... which just so happens to coincide with Spike being back, and I can’t believe I’m just getting that.

GUNN You think whatever recorporealized Spike’s doing a number on the building?

FRED Well, obviously they’re connected. Maybe when Spike’s matter was reintegrated into physical form, it had some sort of ripple effect on the immediate environment. Or, if those gauge readings are correct, it could be the start of something bigger, like-

EVE (standing in Angel’s office doorway) The entire universe thrown into catastrophic turmoil? ’Cause that’s what’s happening, kids. (walks into the office)

GUNN So you know what’s going on?

EVE Only what I’m told, counselor. Corporate seers alerted me to the situation.

ANGEL Which is?

EVE It’s a harbinger.

FRED Harbinger?

EVE Upshot is we’ve got trouble with a capital "T," and that rhymes with "P," and that stands for "prophecy." Shanshu. Maybe you’ve heard of it?

ANGEL Oh, God. That again. Yeah, I’m familiar. So?

EVE So it talks about a champion. A vampire with a soul who’ll play a pivotal role in the apocalypse. (sits on the edge of Angel’s desk) For good or evil. Anybody’s guess. That part’s hazy.

FRED I thought the Shanshu had to do with Angel becoming human again after-

EVE that’s just the epilogue, princess. And, for the record, the prophecy doesn’t call Angel by name.

GUNN Hold on. You’re saying because Spike’s back, you think he’s-

EVE I don’t think anything. All I can tell you is his very existence is disrupting the order of things.

ANGEL No argument here.

GUNN This doesn’t add up. There were already 2 souled vampires in the universe before Spike fried. Why is this happening now?

EVE The keyword here is "champion." Spike gave his life to save the world. That gives him the cred. But when he died and became a ghost, case closed. Now that he’s back, all bets are off, kids.

Gunn walks toward the door.

ANGEL Where are you going?

GUNN To check on something. (exits)

FRED (to Eve) You knew this would happen. All that time I was working on recorporealizing Spike, you never mentioned-

EVE Hey, would’ve said something if I’d known, sweetie. My universe, too, you know. How’d you pull it off, by the way, bringing Spike back? You guys... did do it, right?

ANGEL Something came in the mail for him.

EVE The mail? Like the amulet.

ANGEL (glares at Eve) Yeah. Never did find out who sent it.

FRED (glares at Eve) The senior partners, maybe?

EVE Watch the accusatory stares, kids. I only know...

ANGEL What you’re told. Right. So, the seers told you the phones and all were a harbinger. Of what?

EVE Something worse. And seriously dangerous.

ANGEL What do you mean, dangerous?

Cut to:

8 INT. OFFICE - DAY Spike is humping Harmony, who’s lying on her back on the desk. This escapade is somewhat less than romantic, seeming mostly mechanical and dispassionate. Spike’s not even looking at Harmony.

HARMONY (panting) Sp-Spike!

Harmony’s moans seem more pained than pleasurable. Cut to a view of her face-her eyes are bleeding like the man from the copier station.

SPIKE Shh. Shh. Don’t talk. Let’s not spoil the moment. (Harmony vamps out and bites down hard on Spike’s neck) Aah!

Fade to black.


9 INT. OFFICE - DAY Resume. Harmony has just bitten Spike’s neck.

SPIKE Harmony! Aah! (stands, steps away) What the bloody hell has gotten into- (turns to see her and notices her face) Your eyes.

HARMONY (yelling) I’m not! Not yours!

SPIKE Yeah, right. Not mine. (holds up his hands)

HARMONY Using me. Making me think... feel...like yours.

SPIKE (backs away) Let’s just-

HARMONY You! You don’t want me! You want your slayer whore! (rushes him) I’ll kill you!

Spike punches Harmony, sending her back over the desk where she lands on the floor, unconscious. Spike stands there for a moment, trying to make sense of what just happened.

Cut to:

10 INT. HALLWAY - DAY Medics pull a sheet over the body of the man Jerry killed with the fire extinguisher. Jerry is wheeled away on a stretcher, tied down with restraints.

JERRY Self-centered jerks! (laughs maniacally, thrashing) A little thing called being considerate! (a medic gives him a tranquilizer shot) Replace- (passes out)

Angel and Eve are talking to Lorne, who’s sitting on a box of papers near the copier, holding a handkerchief to his forehead. Written in blood on the wall above the copier is the word "TONER."

LORNE (groans) Yeah, well, then I see Mr. Considerate here, covered in blood, making mashed potatoes out of this fella. And before I could get to, "What’s wrong with this picture?" He clocks me right in the coconut.

SECURITY GUARD Sir, we have 2 more attacks. One fatality.

ANGEL OK, seal off the building. Nobody in or out till we know what we got here. Spell, virus, mass hysteria.

SECURITY GUARD Yes, sir. (to his radio) All channels, we have a code black. Affirmative. We are closing Pandora’s Box.

LORNE (stands) Hey, say, fearless leader, uh, if you don’t mind, what do you say I, uh, nurse this bump with an ice pack while I barricade myself in my office, huh?

ANGEL Your call. Hey, Lorne, do me a favor first. Stop by the lab and tell Fred I need to know the second she figures out what’s causing this.

LORNE Yeah, gotcha. (exits)

EVE Come on, Angel. You know what’s causing all this.

ANGEL No, Eve. I don’t.

EVE This is just the beginning. The fabric of reality is starting to unravel. For my money, it all comes down to you and-

Spike walks out of the office he and Harmony were using, closing the door behind him.

ANGEL Spike.

SPIKE (turns to Angel and Eve) I don’t know what you’re putting in the water coolers around here, but your secretary just started crying blood and tried to rip me a few new ones.

ANGEL Harmony?

SPIKE Had to put her porch lights out. For the best. I’m sure you understand.

ANGEL Oh, yeah. You’re a real hero.

EVE And that’s our problem in a nutshell.

SPIKE Our problem?

ANGEL Eve’s got this theory.

EVE Fact, Jack. There’s only supposed to be one candidate for the vampire with the soul hero part in the big show. Two of you, and the wheel of destiny starts to spin off its axis. That’s why everything and everyone is going mad.

SPIKE Hold on a tick. You’re blaming this on us?

ANGEL No, she’s blaming it on you.

EVE This town might not be big enough for the both of you.

SPIKE (scoffs, walks away down the hall) Well, screw this town, then. Screw this devil’s funhouse, Angel. (turns, points at Angel) And screw you for good measure. I think I’ll take the new flesh and bones across the pond back to Europe.

EVE Spike, by town, I mean this entire plane of existence. (Spike stops at the elevator) You won’t solve this disequilibrium by leaving. (the elevator doors open) You might even make it worse.

GUNN (steps off the elevator, loosening his tie, his eyes wide with fear) Let’s not make it worse. We don’t want worse. I just went to the white room to see what the big cat had to say.


GUNN Cat’s gone.

EVE Gone?

GUNN The white room, too. Elevator just opened up into a howling abyss. You ever heard a howling abyss? Terrible sound.

EVE Cat’s gone means the conduit’s gone means we’re alone in this. No contact with the senior partners. Just us and a big, gaping tear in the balance of the universe.

Spike’s standing at the elevator, holding the doors open. He rolls his eyes.

ANGEL Spike... stay. (Spike shoots a glance at Angel) Please. Europe’ll still be there after we’ve worked this out.

GUNN Maybe.

ANGEL Probably.

SPIKE (lets the elevator doors close) How exactly are you gonna work this out, boss man? You tell me we’re making a tear in the galaxy or whatnot? You think you’re just gonna sew that back up?

EVE If there was just some way to determine which one of you the prophecy’s really about, maybe-

ANGEL I just read the Shanshu prophecy, and I’m telling you, there was nothing in it-

SPIKE Hold on. You read the prophecy? The one you don’t believe in? (Angel rolls his eyes, crosses his arms) Uh, load of rubbish, you said? Well, isn’t that bloody interesting.

ANGEL Spike?

GUNN No offense, Angel. What we need is someone who’s an expert on the Shanshu scriptures.

ANGEL Fine, but Wesley’s not here.

EVE No, but his department is. Maybe somebody there can-

ANGEL Do what? I’m telling you, I read the prophecy.

Cut to:

11 INT. SIRK’S OFFICE - NIGHT Angel’s sitting in a chair in front of the Sirk’s desk. Eve is seated beside Angel. Gunn and Spike are standing behind them. NOTE: Sirk is the man who gave Wesley the tour of Wolfram & Hart in 4x22 "Home."

SIRK You didn’t read the prophecy. (stands)

ANGEL I didn’t?

SIRK You read a translation of the prophecy. (picks up a book, goes back to his desk) It’s like comparing the King James Bible with the original Aramaic, the Hebrew. Much of the flavor, the subtlety of usage, the historical context has been stripped away. (scoffs) Read the prophecy. You may as well have read a 12-year-old’s book report on the subject.

GUNN (whispers to Angel) I miss Wesley.

ANGEL OK, Sirk. Point made. Listen, is there anything in the Shanshu that can help us with what’s going on?

SPIKE Yeah. What’s it say about me?

SIRK There is a newly translated group of verses which may perhaps prove relevant. "The root of the tree will split in 2. And each thing will seek nourishment from the buried river."

SPIKE Sounds like a gardening tip.

SIRK It’s metaphor. Please tell me I don’t have to explain metaphor to you people.

ANGEL Sirk, the text.

SIRK Ah. Here we are. "Storm unleashed. The balance will falter until the vampire with a soul drinks from the cup of perpetual torment."

ANGEL More metaphor.

SIRK No, that’s real.

EVE So there’s a cup.

SPIKE Perpetual torment? Just know that’s not gonna taste very good.

SIRK "He will have the weight of worlds upon him, binding his limbs, grinding his bones to meal until he saves creation... or destroys it."

SPIKE Uh...right. So, what’s in it for me?

SIRK The vampire will have his past washed clean.

ANGEL And live again in mortal form. Yeah, that part I know.

SPIKE Yeah, I bet you do.

GUNN So, Angel drinks from this cup. Our computers go back on line, phones stop ringing, and people quit turning into homicidal maniacs?

SPIKE Who says it’s Angel supposed to take the swig? Who says it’s about him at all?

ANGEL Aw, come on, Spike. You really think this is about you?

SPIKE Oh, why the bloody hell not? Just ’cause you-

EVE Boys, let’s focus on the problem at hand. We don’t want to be wrong about this.

SIRK There is no wrong. The drinking of the cup is predestined. That can’t be changed. Whoever drinks from it was meant to. When one is confirmed as the central figure of the prophecy, the universe should realign itself.

GUNN So, this cup thing. Where is it? Does it say?

SIRK It does offer some details, yes. Housed in the hidden city of Petra. Mm-hmm. Disappears during the crusades. Surfaces again at the Vatican. Vanishes in the third year of the inquisition. Then...yes. Interesting.


SIRK It’s in Nevada.

GUNN Nevada?

SIRK Death Valley, to be exact. "The earth will thrash and mark the appearance of the cup at the columns."

ANGEL Columns? That sounds vaguely-

SIRK "And the desert will swallow cup and house whole and-" this can only be loosely translated. "And the fat lady will sing no more."

ANGEL Opera.

EVE Opera?

ANGEL The columns was an opera house in Death Valley. It was buried in an earthquake in ’38. Made headlines in Los Angeles. That’s only a few hours away. I can get there and back before-

GUNN Angel, we got a seriously major crisis going on here. Might not be the best time to go running after some mystical cup.

ANGEL I really don’t have much of a choice. If it’s there, I’m just gonna have to accept that the prophecy’s real, and hope that it stops this madness. In the meantime, you’re in charge. (stands) Keep this place quarantined till I get- (looks around the room) Where’s Spike?

Spike’s nowhere to be found.

Cut to:

12 EXT. DESERT HIGHWAY - NIGHT Spike’s driving down the desert highway in Angel’s red Viper, singing along with radio.

SPIKE (cell phone rings) Yello.

ANGEL (O.S.) You took my Viper.

SPIKE (grins) My Viper now, mate. Possession’s 9/10s. Oughta know that, running a law firm and such.

Show that Angel is driving down the same highway as well.

ANGEL You think this is a game? People are dying.

SPIKE And one of us is going to stop it. Hey, what do you know? I vote for me.

ANGEL There’s no voting. It’s a prophecy. And the Shanshu’s not about you, Spike.

SPIKE Still can’t accept it, can you? Sad, really. All these years believing you’re the signified monkey, only to find out you’re just a big hunk of nobody cares.

ANGEL I really wished you stayed a ghost.

SPIKE But I didn’t, did I? Burned up saving the world, and now I’m back for real. Wonder why that is? Oh, wait. ’Cause I’m the one, you git!

ANGEL Spike, I don’t have time to-

SPIKE (imitates static) What that? I’m losing you. You’re- ("static") What do they call it? ("static") Oh, right. Breaking up. You’re breaking up.

ANGEL Spike, don’t-

SPIKE (hangs up) Ponce.

ANGEL (hangs up) Idiot.

Cut to:

13 INT. GUNN’S OFFICE - NIGHT Gunn’s standing behind his desk, pacing, talking on a 2-way radio walkie-talkie.

GUNN Yeah, I know she’s a vampire. Just shoot her up with some elephant tranqs and put her in some kind of restraints. (static garbles the transmission) Uh...yeah. Whatever. That’s OK. Just, look get it done. Over and, you know, out. (puts down the radio)

EVE (saunters into Gunn’s office) Always something with this place, huh? I mean, ghost fights, id monsters, killer cyborgs. It’s a wonder with all the hijinks you people ever get any work done. (takes a robot figurine off the shelf and looks at it)

GUNN Funny, you always seem to be around for the...hijinks.

EVE Lucky, I guess.

GUNN Yeah? And what else are you, Eve? Besides lucky.

EVE (innocently) Am I supposed to know what that-

GUNN Playing like you’re just a fresh young thing from Santa Cruz who somehow winds up connected to the senior partners of Evil, Incorporated.

EVE Never said I was from Santa Cruz. Just went to school there. And if we’re talking about being connected, Charles, you’re the guy that talks to the cat upstairs.

Through the window in the background, a man is seen walking menacingly toward Gunn’s office wielding a fireman’s axe.

EVE I think that makes you a lot more connected to this place than I’ll ever be. As far as the senior partners are concerned, I’m just a messenger.

The man is still approaching, unnoticed by Gunn and Eve.

GUNN (chuckles) Right. And I’m just a mild-mannered attorney.

A security guard topples the axe-wielding man right before he gets to Gunn’s office window. Eve and Gunn turn to look at the commotion, but don’t see the men on the floor.

GUNN (takes the robot away from Eve, points at her) Don’t be fingerin’ the robots. (reshelves the robot)

Cut to:

14 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT Spike and Angel arrive separately at the opera house located in the middle of the open desert. Angel looks around, when Spike speaks from a balcony above him.

SPIKE Here we are, then. 2 vampire heroes... competing to wet our whistle with a drink of light, refreshing torment.

ANGEL Is that what you think you are-a hero?

SPIKE Saved the world, didn’t I?

ANGEL Once. Talk to me after you’ve done it a couple more times.

SPIKE Done talking, mate. Got a prophecy needs fulfilling. (waves shortly) Ta. (walks out of sight)

ANGEL Spike! (follows him) Damn it!

Cut to:

15 INT. VICTORIAN ERA HOTEL - NIGHT William walks into the hotel and sees Angelus humping a woman dressed in white on the bed.

WILLIAM Well... looks like you haven’t had your fill of her after all-

Angelus leans back, revealing that’s he’s been with Drusilla.

DRUSILLA (rolls her head over to look at William) The little children didn’t come out to play. (sits up, leaning closer to Angelus’s chest) Did you miss me, pretty William?

ANGELUS I’m sure he did, Dru. After all... you are his destiny.

DRUSILLA Oh. That’s so sweet.

Angelus laughs at William. Drusilla joins in the laughter. William gets a look of enraged hatred as he glares at Angelus.

Cut to:

16 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT Angel walks down through the rows of seats in the opera hall toward the stage where the golden cup sits spotlighted on a pedestal. Angel jumps onto the stage, and as he gets close to the cup, Spike jumps down from the rafters behind him. Angel stops, rolls his eyes. They both look at the cup.

SPIKE Thought it’d be a little less goldeny, what with the torment and all.

ANGEL So... what do we do now?

SPIKE (sighs, punches Angel, snickers) What do ya think?

Fade to black.


17 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT Spike paces back and forth while Angel gets back to his feet.

SPIKE Come on! Let’s see how much soul you really got in there.

ANGEL Spike, we don’t have time for this.

SPIKE Keep your knickers dry, Sally. You’re not gonna last that long.

ANGEL (sighs, stands) Fine. We’ll do it your way.

Angel and Spike start fist-fighting. They trade punches, then Spike throws Angel up in the air, where he lands on a balcony behind him. Angel lands on a cross, which burns him, and he recoils angrily, kicking the cross down to the stage below.

SPIKE Ha ha ha ha! Oh, yeah. Look at you. Thinking you’re the big savior-fighting for truth, justice, and soccer moms-but you still can’t lay flesh on a cross without smelling like bacon, can you?

ANGEL Like you’re any different.

SPIKE Well, that’s just it. I am. And you know it. You had a soul forced on you-as a curse. Make you suffer for all the horrible things you’d done. But me... I fought for my soul. Went through the demon trials. Almost did me in a dozen times over, but I kept fighting. ’Cause I knew it was the right thing to do. (jumps up to the balcony in one smooth motion, landing in front of Angel) It’s my destiny.

ANGEL Really? Heard it was just to get into a girl’s pants.

Spike uses his toe to lift a metal rod of rebar into his hands. He swings it at Angel, but Angel does a somersault off of the balcony, landing on the stage near the cup. Angel walks toward the cup, when Spike throws the rebar at him like a spear, narrowly missing him. Angel turns to look at Spike, who jumps from the balcony wielding another rod of rebar.

SPIKE (jumping) Yaaaagh!

Angel grabs the first piece of rebar that Spike threw at him and uses it to deflect Spike’s weapon.

Cut to:

18 INT. SCIENCE LABORATORY - NIGHT Harmony is wheeled into the lab on a stretcher. She is restrained and unconscious.

GUNN 6 more cases. That’s what-a 30% increase in the last hour?

FRED 32.4, but who’s counting?

EVE Any idea what the specific trigger is?

FRED None. There is no common thread. Gender, age, position, psych profile, blood type, med history- there doesn’t seem to be any pattern to this thing. It seems like it could affect any of us.

EVE Is there anything we can-

GUNN Why are you answering her questions, Fred? (shudders) We don’t trust this bitch. (looks up, revealing that he, too, is now bleeding from his eyes) She’ll kill us all.

FRED Gunn!

GUNN (grabs Eve by the neck, squeezing her throat, pressing her back against the wall) What are you, huh?

FRED Gunn, no! (prepares a tranquilizer gun)

GUNN (enraged) What’s really in there, huh? Huh?! (Eve gasps) Well, heh, guess you gotta breathe. Good to know.

Fred approaches him with the tranquilizer gun, but he smacks her, knocking her down and shattering the vial of medicine in the gun.

GUNN You liar! You think we don’t know that you’re behind this, that you’ve been playin’ us?! What are you, huh? Show me! What are you-a monster? (screaming) Show me!

Fred smacks Gunn in the head with a metal tray, knocking him down and loose from Eve. Eve holds her throat and gasps for air.

Cut to:

19 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT Angel and Spike are fighting, using the rebar rods as staffs. Angel gets a punch in, knocking Spike down.

SPIKE Used to hit a lot harder, gramps. (stands)

ANGEL No, your head’s just gotten thicker.

They continue to fight, and Angel pushes Spike further and further back. Angel finally swings the rebar rod like a baseball bat, knocking Spike up into the balcony. Angel follows him, ready to swing at Spike again, but Spike stands and blocks the swing.

SPIKE You’re not gonna win this time.

Spike punches Angel, knocking him off of the balcony. He lands on the stage below, coughing and bleeding at the mouth.

SPIKE (jumping down to the stage) Vampire with a soul. Nobody knows what side he’s gonna fight on... when the big show comes down. Except we already know what side you’re on, don’t we? Already made your choice. Traded in your cape and tights for a nice comfy chair at Wolfram & bloody Hart.

Spike swings the rebar, ready to jab it into Angel’s neck, but Angel reaches up and grabs it before he can complete the motion.

ANGEL Little more complicated than that. (uses the rebar Spike’s holding to get leverage to stand, knocking Spike down in the process) But you always were a bit simple... Willy. (throws the rebar down, walks toward the cup)

Cut to:

20 INT. VICTORIAN ERA HOTEL - NIGHT Angelus throws William into the wall, squeezing his neck.

WILLIAM Don’t touch her!

ANGELUS Little late for that, Willy. And I really don’t like it when you raise your voice to me.

DRUSILLA William, don’t play such a sad tune. (reclines seductively) Give us a kiss, then.

WILLIAM Why did you...? You knew. You knew she was mine.


WILLIAM You knew bloody well! (wrenches himself free of Angelus’s grasp and punches him) (charging Angelus) Unh-aaaugh!

Angelus deflects William easily and pushes him to the ground.

ANGELUS Just don’t get it now, do you? (picks William up by the lapels, throwing him onto the couch) (pushes the corpses off the couch and sits beside William) Well, you’re new... and a little dim. So let me explain to you how things are now. There’s no belonging or deserving anymore. You can take what you want, have what you want... but nothing is yours. (Drusilla walks out into the doorway) Not even her.

WILLIAM You’re wrong. We’re forever, Drusilla and me.

DRUSILLA (clasps her hands over her heart) Are we?

ANGELUS Ah, still the poet now, aren’t we, Willy?

WILLIAM William.

ANGELUS Right. William. You know, you really should find a new name for yourself. It just doesn’t strike the right note of terror. (pats William’s knee; stands; goes to stand behind Drusilla) Tell you what... William. If you want her... (slips his hands around Drusilla’s body, below the waist) come and take her.

Drusilla holds her hands out, beckoning William. William charges Angelus angrily.

Cut to:

21 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT As Angel reaches for the cup, Spike charges at him, punching him hard, knocking them both down. They stand, both having their hand at the other’s throat.

SPIKE Come on, hero. Tell me more. (punches Angel) Teach me what it means. (punches Angel) And I’ll tell you why you can’t stand the bloody sight of me. (punches Angel)

ANGEL (punches Spike) Tell it to your therapist. (punches Spike)

SPIKE (punches Angel) ’Cause every time you look at me... (punches Angel) you see all the dirty little things I’ve done, (punches Angel) all the lives I’ve taken... (punches Angel) because of you! Drusilla sired me... (punches Angel) but you... you made me a monster. (punches Angel, walks toward the cup)

ANGEL (collapses to the ground) I didn’t make you, Spike. I just opened up the door... (starts to get up) and let the real you out.

Spike picks up the cross that burned Angel before and swings it at Angel, knocking him across the room. Spike holds the cross in his hands.

SPIKE You never knew the real me. (hands sizzle on the cross; he throws it away; walks toward Angel) Too busy trying to see your own reflection... praying there was someone as disgusting as you in the world, so you could stand to live with yourself. Take a long look, hero. I’m nothing like you!

ANGEL No. You’re less. That’s why Buffy never really loved you: Because you weren’t me.

SPIKE (grabs Angel by the lapels) Guess that means she was thinking about you... all those times I was puttin’ it to her.

Angel grabs Spike’s wrists and pulls them apart. He punches Spike, then throws him across the room, causing some of the wood props to shatter. They fist fight, and Spike jabs Angel in the arm with a splinter of wood. Angel rips the splinter out of his arm and glares at Spike.

ANGEL All right... (changes into vampire face) let’s finish this.

Spike changes into vampire face as well. They charge each other.

Fade to black.


22 INT. FRED’S OFFICE - NIGHT A visibly shaken Eve sits in a chair in Fred’s office. Fred brings her a glass of water and kneels in front of her.

FRED (talking softly) Take small sips. It’s gonna hurt to swallow for a while. (Eve coughs) You’re gonna be OK, just-

EVE (looking down) You don’t have to pretend to care.

FRED What?

EVE Oh, come on, Fred. (looks at Fred) I know what you think of me. What you all... (cries)

FRED Look, what Charles said, about us thinking you’re behind... you know, everything. He was under the effects- (Eve sets the glass down, stands and walks to the door) Eve.

EVE (turns to face Fred, shakes her head) I am not the bad guy. (walks out)

Cut to:

23 INT. COLUMNS OPERA HOUSE - NIGHT In full vampire form, Angel and Spike fight on the stage of the opera house.

ANGEL (scratches Spike’s chest with a fragment of wood) How’s it feel?

SPIKE (scratches Angel’s chest) You tell me.

Spike kicks Angel repeatedly in the gut, and the wood fragment Angel was holding goes flying into the air. Spike kicks Angel to the ground, grabs the wood fragment from the air, and rears back in a staking motion. He pauses for a moment, then drives the stake into Angel’s body, causing him to scream in pain. Spike stands, looks down at Angel, revealing that he drove the stake into Angel’s shoulder. Angel lets his face slip back into human form.

SPIKE Probably should’ve dusted you. (returns to human face) But honestly... I don’t want to hear her bitch about it. (turns to walk toward the cup)

ANGEL (pulls the stake out of his shoulder) Spike, wait. (Spike picks up the cup) Wait. (Spike rolls his eyes) That’s not a prize you’re holding. (Spike looks at Angel) It’s not a trophy. It’s a burden. It’s a cross. (Angel stands) One you’re gonna have to bear till it burns you to ashes. Believe me. I know. (Spike puts the cup back on the pedestal and looks at Angel) So ask yourself: Is this really the destiny that was meant for you? Do you even really want it? Or is it that you just want to take something away from me?

SPIKE (shrugs) Bit of both. (drinks from the cup)

ANGEL (lunges to try to stop him, but too late) Spike-

SPIKE (drops the cup, stares at Angel, bewildered) I-it’s... Mountain Dew.

Angel looks at the cup, then at Spike. They stare at each other in confusion.

Cut to:

24 INT. SCIENCE LABORATORY - DAY A bloody and beaten Angel walks into the lab. Fred is there checking on Harmony and Gunn, who are still restrained on stretchers.


FRED Angel. (rushes to him) God, what happened?

ANGEL I fell down... some stairs. Big stairs. Gunn.

FRED We’ve tried everything-medical, mystical. Nothing’s stopping it.

ANGEL It’s still going on?

FRED And getting worse. What about the cup? Did you...

ANGEL Ah, it was a fake. Somebody set us up.

FRED What? Who?

ANGEL I don’t know. Sirk was the one who sent us there. Maybe he’s-

SPIKE (walks into the lab, also still bloody and beaten) Gone. Cleaned out his office and pulled a puff of smoke.

FRED (looks at Spike, then at Angel) Stairs, huh?

ANGEL All right. Sirk’s gone. The cup’s a fake, but the madness is real. So what are we gonna do about it?

GUNN (groggily) I say we start by untying the brother.

FRED Charles. (unties his restraints)

HARMONY (comes to, looks at her restraints) Am I in trouble? (Angel unties her)

GUNN (looks around) Hey. What the hell happened?

Cut to:

25 INT. ANGEL’S OFFICE - DAY Eve briefs Angel, Gunn, and Spike in Angel’s office.

EVE Senior partners stepped in. Apparently they were working on the problem since it started. They managed to temporarily stabilize the universal equilibrium.

ANGEL Temporarily? For how long? What about Sirk and this fantasy he fed us about the cup?

EVE Partners don’t know a thing about it. They’re as angry as you.

ANGEL Really doubt that.

EVE Don’t worry, Angel. Sirk can’t hide for long. We’ll bring him in, find out who put him up to it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go home and ice my neck. (stands, walks to the door)

GUNN (stands) Uh, Eve... (goes to Eve) uh... listen... I’m really...

EVE Don’t sweat it, counselor. You’ve other things to worry about. The whole Shanshu thing’s still unresolved. Still 2 vampires with souls. Guess that’s a question for another day. (exits)

GUNN Any more days like today, and there won’t be another day.

SPIKE Yeah, well... meantime... (stands) this souled ex-ghost vampire’s got some corporeal drinking to catch up on. What do ya say, Charlie-boy? Feel like gettin’ pissed?

GUNN No. No, my head feels like it’s gonna split open and toss my toys and candy all over the floor. (sits on the table near Angel)

SPIKE You’re way ahead of me. Fair enough. (exits)

ANGEL Maybe you should have Fred check you out.

GUNN Nah, she’ll just wanna strap me down again. (sighs) You OK?

ANGEL I don’t know. He beat me, Gunn.

GUNN Who, Spike? Looks to me like he got as good as he-

ANGEL No. He beat me to the cup.

GUNN You mean the fake cup? The make-believe, fairy-tale cup? So what?!

ANGEL No, you don’t... (sighs) He won the fight, Gunn... for the first time. Doesn’t matter if the cup is real or not. (sighs) In the end, he... Spike was stronger. He wanted it more.

GUNN Angel, it doesn’t mean anything.

ANGEL What if it does? What if it means that... I’m not the one?

Cut to:

26 INT. APARTMENT - NIGHT A smiling Eve walks into an apartment where the door jambs and the door are covered in strange symbols. She closes the door behind her, sets her purse on the table, and unbuttons her coat.

EVE You know, funny thing about throwing the universe out of whack... not as fun as it sounds. (takes off her coat) On the plus side, they totally fell for the cup of torment thing. Just like you thought they would. (sits, unbuckles her shoes) And our Mr. Sirk pulled off his vanishing act without a hitch. Right under the senior partners’ noses. (unzips her dress) And you might be happy to know... Team Angel is on red alert. (slips her dress off) Could be they think the partners just fired a warning shot across their bow. (takes off her bra and panties) Oh, and, by the way, Spike didn’t kill Angel, but they did beat each other to bloody pulps.

Eve crawls into bed and snuggles up under the covers to Lindsey, whose chest and arms are covered in the same kinds of symbols that are on the door. He puts his arm around her and pulls her close to him.

LINDSEY Well... it’s a start.

Fade to black.


Creator: Joss Whedon David Greenwalt Producer: Stephen S. DeKnight Co-Producer: Skip Schoolnik Consulting Producer: David Greenwalt Supervising Producer: Ben Edlund Co-Executive Producer: David Fury Jeffrey Bell Executive Producers: Joss Whedon

Sandy Gallin Gail Berman Fran Rubel Kuzui Kaz Kuzui

Produced By: Kelly A. Manners Written By: David Fury & Steven S. DeKnight

Directed By: Skip Schoolnik